I’ve always been pretty easygoing, never had problems like this in my 13 years in the field. Recently started managing a team of 5, and one team member seems openly upset they didn’t get my position.
She makes small comments during meetings to disagree with my decisions, even though the changes I made have already improved efficiency. Just yesterday, during a meeting, she replied “Duh” to a valid question about CRM management. I found that incredibly rude, so I talked to her privately after the meeting. I explained that her attitude could negatively affect the team. She seemed to understand but kept looking away with a smirk and never apologized.
I really don’t want to fire her, especially since I’m new here, but I can’t let this slide forever. What would you do in my position?
This is tough but not uncommon. I like how you’re thinking about the team’s morale—good leaders care about that.
Remember, her attitude isn’t about you; it’s her insecurity showing. Don’t let it get to you, and definitely don’t show that it does. Focus on being excellent at your job and making it clear why they hired you. Show the team why you’re the right fit without putting her down.
Also, try to find her strengths and acknowledge them. Give her responsibility for something meaningful but manageable. That could shift her mindset and make her feel like part of the solution.
Leadership is about helping the team grow, even the difficult ones. You’ve got this. Patience can go a long way.
I’m with you on that. I see the team’s success as my own, so I’ll stay patient for now. But if it happens again, I’m ready to take action, like putting her on a performance improvement plan. Thanks for your advice.
That’s a good suggestion, but her role is pretty defined, and I want to keep things balanced. Instead, I might ask her to suggest two ways we can improve how she works and explore implementing them. That way, she feels heard and valued. Thanks for sparking the idea!
Jealousy can be tricky to handle. A private talk where you acknowledge her feelings and set clear expectations might help. You could also highlight her strengths and give her some ownership over a project. If she doesn’t improve, it might be time to involve HR. Stay firm but fair.
Good points. I’m planning to ask her for two ideas on how to improve her work and consider applying them. That might help her feel appreciated. Thanks for the advice!
You’re on the right track by addressing it privately. Finding ways to empower her or acknowledge her strengths could shift her attitude. It might take time, but small steps can lead to big changes.
Thanks! I’m going to ask her to suggest some initiatives to improve her work. It might help her feel more comfortable and valued. Appreciate your thoughts.
There’s a podcast by Manager Tools that covers this exact scenario—how to manage someone who feels passed over for promotion. It’s worth checking out.
Her behavior might be a mix of feeling unrecognized and embarrassed. Try to build a one-on-one connection, focus on positive reinforcement, and don’t tolerate toxic behavior. You’re doing great by addressing it early.
Letting her attitude slide might encourage others to act the same way. You need to show that you’re firm on maintaining respect and professionalism in the team. Have you thought about setting boundaries during team meetings to keep things productive?